


i know i don't say anything (but i feel everything)

by 3_mik



Category: Apex Legends (Video Games)
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, F/F, Pre-Relationship, Slow Burn, Temporary Character Death, wraith has a gay rivalry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-03
Updated: 2020-01-03
Packaged: 2021-02-25 09:08:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,875
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22073386
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/3_mik/pseuds/3_mik
Summary: Wraith did not like Bangalore. At all.Confident and down-to-earth yet competitive, she irked Wraith in some irrational way. But defeating the assertive and strong soldier did get a smirk out of her.That'll show you...in which wraith has an emotion regarding another legend
Relationships: Bangalore | Anita Williams/Wraith | Renee Blasey
Comments: 6
Kudos: 45





	i know i don't say anything (but i feel everything)

**Author's Note:**

> hello to the approximately 6 bangawraith stans reading  
> this doesn't follow game rules by a 100%, a mix of the lore & in-game.  
> also lowkey includes mirage&wraith + bloodhound&bangalore friendships bc i lov them

Wraith did not like Bangalore when she showed up to the games. At all.

Confident and down-to-earth yet competitive, she irked Wraith in some irrational way. Learning that Bangalore was a IMC soldier got Wraith agitated, _what if they were after her,_ _was she sent to capture her._ Wraith made sure to stay on camera's at all times, waiting for any warnings inside her head, any suspicious activity from the soldier.

But nothing out of the ordinary happened. Sure, Bangalore tried to kill her, it's a game after all, and it seemed like Bangalore was a regular competitor for the sport.

This didn't make Wraith dislike her any less and she still had her guard up.

Wraith masked her annoyance with her usual indifference, but defeating the assertive and strong Bangalore in the ring did get a smirk out of her. _That'll show you. ___

But it turned out, Bangalore was also frustratingly good at combat and learned the games quickly, much to Wraith's chagrin.  
Soon enough they would evenly trade kills, Wraith was used to subtle trash talking and apparently Bangalore also picked up the habit of smug one-liners upon defeating someone.

_..._

Another day, another game for Wraith, and some soldier wasn't going to ruin her day. Hopefully.

The team rosters had been announced, and before Wraith had the chance to react to the fact that she had been paired with Bangalore for the first time, the legend in question had walked up and introduced herself to Wraith.  
Which was honestly unnecessary, they already knew each others names through the various announcements that rang throughout the game and real names don't matter.  
(Though she would probably be looking up Sergeant Anita Williams online later.)  
Wraith nonetheless had shook her hand and responded with mumbling her own name.

"Good to have you by my side, Wraith."

Wraith had irked again and moved her gaze to literally anywhere but Bangalore.

Her dislike towards Bangalore was, mostly, unjust but she couldn't help being petty, especially after Bangalore had pointed a Mozambique at her almost point blank.

Wraith had made a mental note to keep track of Bangalore's every mistake within the upcoming game, she was sure.

_..._

_Of course she's a good teammate_  
They were at the top three already, Bangalore proving to be an absolute blessing to her team, and Wraith was feeling a headache coming.

While Bangalore didn't have the most experience with this sort of skirmish, her intuition was good, combat skills impressive, and open with communication.  
She also stayed calm under pressure (which had taken Wraith quite the time to master) and knew a lot about weaponry.

Wraith had somewhat wished Bangalore would get downed during their first fight so Wraith could've proven who's the better one out of the two, but it never happened.  


The times Bangalore did get hurt, she retreated and healed up safely without causing problems.

Wraith had no complaints with her performance and that was the worst part.  
She had tried to find any logical reason to dislike Bangalore, but the woman proved to be too competent.

Wraith suppressed a sigh as they trekked through an old town of abandoned buildings.  
They had heard sounds of gunfire nearby, Bangalore was scouting for the final two squads through the scope of her sniper rifle.

Wraith hoped they weren't about to clash with full squads, their teammate deathbox was left in the ring so it was just the two.

Wraith fiddled with her kunai in a nervous habit, while looking at the scoped in Bangalore.

No voices gave any warnings, leaving them to wait for any sign of hostiles in quiet.

Bangalore's face was neutral and focused, much like Wraith usually was.

Wraith stayed still, lightly chewing her lip in thought, recalling their earlier firefights and their success in getting this far. Bangalore sure was impressive, maybe not as good as Wraith, but pretty close. She was also self-assured and made some snarky remarks about their enemies from time to time.

A quick thought passed over Wraith, did she dislike Bangalore because they were alike? She dismissed the thought, Bangalore was more open (not that it meant much, being compared to Wraith), more confident maybe.  
Wraith guessed they were both hard-asses though.

Wraith's thoughts were dissipated when Bangalore moved away from her position, replaced her sniper with an assault rifle.  
"We should head east, saw some movement around there."  
Wraith just nodded, got up while sheathing her kunai for now.

Bangalore was already jogging forward but stopped to look over her shoulder if Wraith was following. And of course she was and Bangalore did not have to check, but Wraith might have thought the gesture a bit comforting. Maybe.

_..._

When Wraith woke up, she recognised the hospital bed she has woken up so many times before. She felt so tired, cursing that she woke up already, an hour more of medically induced sleep would've been great.

Still, she sat up and looked around, noticing another legend on the other side of the large room. Anita Williams. She looked more banged up than Wraith expected, a doctor was looking at her readings and explaining something Wraith couldn't hear.

They had gotten rid of a three man squad together, but not before the final squad had barged in while Wraith had been healing.

She ended up going down real fast, no match for three enemies wounded and by herself. Bangalore had been healing in a more remote spot and upon hearing Wraith call for help, had called in an airstrike and ran to her location, launching smoke over Wraith, trying to revive her with the smoke concealing the two, but their enemies bullets ended up hitting their mark at close range.

It was a mistake that had cost them their potential victory but Wraith couldn't hold it against her, not really.

The other legend seemed groggy, despite the doctor talking to her, before their eyes locked for a second.  


Wraith shifted her gaze, eyeing the wrappings over Bangalore's torso. Noticing Wraith's gaze on her wounds, for a second Bangalore sent an apologetic smile to Wraith's way.  


Wraith looked away, it was rude to stare after all, and the next time her eyes moved to Bangalore's face, the soldier was back to her calm self, replying to the doctor.

_..._

They formed a sort of silent respect after that.  
Wraith had to admit that her previous dislike for the woman had turned into a secret (maybe) one-sided rivalry. Bangalore was good and it made Wraith want to be _better._

And Wraith noticed a change in their dynamic.

When in opposing teams, Bangalore's remarks would turn less insulting of her opponents and more confident on herself.

Few tried to chase down after Wraith when she started phasing or using portals, but Miss Anita seemed to be up for a challenge.

Wraith responded with showing off her skills just a bit more when the voices would warn of a soldier.

Bangalore could've sworn she heard just a hint of a smile when Wraith addressed her enemies.

Being against Bangalore always motivated Wraith more than any cash prize ever could.

Together on a team, Bangalore never underestimated Wraith's abilities (which was much appreciated) and sought out her opinions, a pleasant change from some players that would assume Wraith was just a feral fighter (which she had to admit, fair).

In exchange, Wraith often tried to find the best equipment for Bangalore, discreetly of course. She justified this through an inner monologue explaining how she could show off how much better she was by defeating the enemies with a weaker armor or less ammo.

Bangalore usually accepted the equipment with a thanks, sometimes refusing if she thought Wraith would benefit from the equipment more than her, usually while explaining in-depth why.

Unlike Wraith, who had only some surface level knowledge on guns, Bangalore seemed to know just about everything.  
And she learned that Bangalore liked talking about guns when prompted. This caused Wraith to ask some questions ("which of these two eats more ammo?", "should i switch optics?", "which one you would prefer?") that she would've otherwise brushed off.

But hearing Bangalore talk was nice (and informative, so there's a reason to chatter), Wraith had been used to silence from her teammates outside of battles.  
(Except like Mirage, who physically couldn't stay quiet.)

Bangalore would also occasionally slip in some amusing stories, old one's from her military days and newer one's from her time in the games.

Bangalore's frame was rigid while walking and explaining a story of how one time her teammate jumped on top of an enemy to get a prized Mastiff.

They were walking side-by-side through a sparse building, looking for any remaining loot.

Bangalore's hand stayed on her gun even without any visible threat nearby, but her gaze looked relaxed, lips slightly upturned.  
Wraith silently thought the soldier was more attractive this way and a passing voice inside her head commented _She's nice._

Bangalore finished her story, concluding on how her teammate never even got to use the damned weapon before dying and how she went on, took the weapon from her teammates person, and won the game with the stolen Mastiff.

"Nice job, Anita."  
Wraith huffed at that, not bothering to hide her amusement.

It thoroughly catched Bangalore's attention though, the legend halted to look at Wraith's face. 

Wraith regretted everything immediately, letting her guard down, chatting throughout the game, thinking that all of this was pleasant. She just wanted to open up a portal and shift away immediately, Bangalore's wide eyes making her feel like a dumbass. She really just dropped the first name bomb on the other in a foolish way, not asking if it was cool to do beforehand or anything. If she really was a soldier sent to kill Wraith, this would be the moment she should strike.

Wraith had opened her mouth to apologize but Bangalore broke the two second silence first.  
"It's cool, Bangalore 's kinda long anyway."  
Her gaze had moved away and she was shifting her grip on her submachine gun.

Wraith had just nodded and started walking again in silence. After a minute of walking around and not finding anything useful, Anita had asked, "So will I get to know your real name anytime soon?"

She had presented it as a light-hearted question with a small smile, it caused Wraith to grin back.

"I think I'll stay as a mystery for now."  


_..._

Another match is beginning soon, Wraith is sitting in her sparsely decorated dropship room, fiddling with her scarf idly. They're about to find out their squads soon. Some legends already gathered together, preparing to drop.

Wraith sees Bloodhound and Gibraltar having a conversation with Anita, two smiles and one upturned mask.  
They all look casual, as if they are close pals outside of murdering eachother. Maybe they are. Wraith wouldn't know, the time spent outside of the games is usually dedicated on searching any info on past IMC research, not socializing with her fellow participants (except for the two times Mirage dragged her to Paradise Lounge).

She sighs and looks at the walls, anything to distract her. The voices aren't providing anything useful and she needs something to take her mind off of them. 

Soon enough Mirage walks over, demanding attention as he explains how his demonstration of youth lingo did not go over well with Wattson, Lifeline and Octane.

This gets a smile out of Wraith and he takes it as a cue to start chattering about his last match and how he's totally gonna do better this time and win this time around.

(Wraith points out that his tactical thinking could use a fix, getting a scoff from Mirage as he starts explaining that it was _one time,_ he didn't know that there was _a fourth squad_ and how retreat was _not_ on his agenda.)

They banter back and forth with good-nature, his presence alleviating the various voices that plague her. While Mirage is a doofus and Wraith sometimes just wants to smack him, he's also a good friend. Not that Wraith would admit it out loud to him, his ego doesn't need more stroking.  
The conversation continues until the loud announcement comes. Time to team up.

They both get up and look up their team placements.  
Mirage is with Bangalore and Bloodhound, lucky.  
He waves his goodbyes as he runs over to meet the two. Anita sees Mirage and her gaze follows his path to where Wraith is still standing, and nods at her, silently wishing good luck.  
Wraith responds with a curt nod while moving towards her own team.

_..._

The battlefield is a chaos. Wraith's teammates are new to the games, (she didn't bother with learning their names) and hungry for some kills and attention.  
Which led to the three of them third-partying a battle between two squads, taking some down on both sides until a fourth squad showed up.

So she's huddled behind a huge tree, healing while her teammates are chucking grenades in an attempt to distract the enemies. The sounds of gunfire and a few grenades keep on coming, Wraith counted that there's at least seven enemies left alive, but who knows who's dead and who has been revived by now. Also is that a fifth squad sniping them?

The voices are frequent, she keeps phasing as much as she can to avoid bullets, the natural terrain not providing enough shelter in this circumstance.

Traveling through the void, she sees herself from various timelines and dimensions wounded or worse and she knows she can't stay here.

Her teammates are running out of grenades and seem to be low on heals, Wraith decides that it's time to retreat. She drops to lower ground and runs to a secluded spot to open a portal. Clutching her hand, the portal opens, Wraith calls her location to her teammates.

But she hears heavy footsteps behind her, a voice in her head warns her and she phases, out of instinct. She takes out her Peacekeeper and moves to the side, estimating where her enemy is, gun ready when she returns from the void.

She takes aim, gun charging and phases in.  
Wraith shoots before she even properly sees anything, hearing the shots connecting with the armor of another legend.  
It's Anita and she's caught off-guard when the shotgun shells hit her in the back. She turns and takes aim with her pistol, the shot grazes Wraith before a second Peacekeeper shot lands on her.  


Anita goes down on her knees, clutching her stomach in an futile effort to keep the blood from spilling. Her face doesn't falter by much and her eyes look up at Wraith. Nothing is said between the two, and while Wraith knows that this is a bloodsport and this happens all the time, seeing Anita like this makes her feel regret, just for a moment.

She stays silent and there's a moment of quiet lament before Wraith hears her teammates scurry over.  
Before she can say anything, contestant Bangalore is shot down by Wraith's now jeering teammate.

Wraith is angry, but knows she can't show it, so she just grips her fist and moves to the portal without looking back.

The game goes on.

_..._

A voice in her head yells her to duck.

It's too late, four shots ring, two connecting.

She recognises the unique sound of the shots, unwilling association of G7 Scout and her assailant. _Her favourite gun._

The two sniper shots hit her back, one coming out through her stomach. It hurts, Wraith tries to keep on running, taking cover behind a concrete wall, but can't stay upright. Her communicator is dropped as she goes down.  


Her teammates probably heard the shots and Wraith knows they aren't coming back for her, teamwork was never her strong suit so she let her team go before her while she left behind.

She crawls, trying to move her body upwards against the wall to maintain any dignity, but her hands feel weak under her bleeding body and she ends up going back down on her back.

She hisses through gritted teeth, it hurts more, even the slight touch of grass on her bullet wounds is unbearable.

She hears a voice inside her head, _she's coming,_ but knows there's nothing to do in her current state.

After a few moments, she finally hears heavy footsteps, and Anita steps into view. Bloodhound & Mirage, who are responsible for Anita's respawn, behind her.

Anita locks her gaze on Wraith, looking unaffected as ever, as if she didn't just snipe her in the gut.

"I'll handle this one, go finish up the rest of them"  
She sees the masked hunter behind Anita nodding, already running off with Mirage who gave a sorry glance towards Wraith.

It's just the two of them, again in silence as the other bleeds.

"Looks like you got your revenge." Wraith tries to stay composed while her eyes remain looking at the soldier, but wavers a bit, the pain pushing through.

"More like, we're even now."

She steps closer, eyeing Wraith's wound, face unreadable. Wraith expected Anita to be proud, maybe comment on her skills at the least, but the other legend remains quiet.

"Two hits out of four, that's a good shot"

Bangalore huffs at that, sounding amused and tired. Wraith wonders if she gets enough rest.

"Yeah, you are a slippery one..."

For a moment Wraith thinks she's here to just quietly watch her bleed to death, but then sees Anita take aim with her smoke launcher.

A voice yells in Wraith's head to watch out, and she has seen how much one canister would hurt from close range.

She braces for impact, arms coming to protect her face, eyes tightly shut.

Wraith hears the loud noise of the smoke cannister hitting the ground instead of her. She opens her eyes, and there's smoke all around her.  
She coughs, and sees the blurry figure of Anita crouching by her right side.

A hand comes to grab Wraith's collar and scarf, tugging her upwards and Wraith stiffens, expecting another hand to punch her right back down, finishing the job.

But no punch comes, instead a strong arm pulls her to sit up, keeping Wraith upright.  
Anita's hand is firm, pulling Wraith close by her jacket, she can now see her more clearly.

Wraith looks at her, searching for an answer, and for the first time, witnessing her eyes looking unsure.

Wraith feels a gentle hand going to her bundled hair, softly patting the hair in a calming way. It would be pleasant if she wasn't dying.

They gaze at eachother, Anita's expression looks soft and emotional, unlike her usual cold, hard demeanor. 

Wraith can't help but to think of it as endearing.

Anita tears her gaze away, looking at the bleeding on Wraith's torso, clothes now properly stained with the blood.  
Wraith sees Anita's lips tightening and eyebrows moving to convey a silent apology while her thumb rubs Wraith's scalp.  
Wraith feels her heart sting at Anita's expression.

Wraith moves her palm to the others cheek, caressing her in a soothing manner, causing Anita to meet her gaze again.

"Hey. It's okay." Wraith reassures her. She feels a bit foolish while doing so, the other legend knows it's not an offense or a permanent death she has caused.  
But Wraith can't help trying to comfort her, even if she herself is the one Anita is mourning.

Anita smiles faintly, moving closer and bringing her forehead to rest on Wraith's. Wraith doesn't mind, she isn't used to this kind of intimacy, yet it feels right. Like it's the right path.

Anita's hand goes from the hair to the scruff of her neck. Her gloved fingers rubbing Wraith's skin softly.

Wraith doesn't say anything, smiling despite her state and closes her eyes, stroking Bangalore's cheek when she feels her move.

When chapped lips meet hers in a light kiss, Wraith feels at ease.  
Their proximity makes her feel secure and comfortable despite her state and Wraith realizes how much she wanted this.

Anita deepens their kiss, moves her hand to support Wraith's back, avoiding the wound, making sure Wraith stays upright.  


Wraith kisses back with fervor.  
She doesn't want to stop kissing her but her wounds ache and the smoke around them is stifling.

She withdraws from Anita's touch to inhale, still keeping her hand on her cheek. Wraith coughs to her gloved fist, her whole body shaking and the pain causing her to hiss.

Anita leans into Wraith's hand, moving to press an apologetic kiss to her palm. Wraith watches the soldier face.

Wraith feels her heart pound, admiring Anita's features, how her cheeks are looking just a bit more warm than usual.  
Wraith notices Anita's not looking her in the eye, while appearing hesitant.

"Can I see you after the game?"  


Wraith hears Anita's genuine voice break the silence, sees her heartfelt eyes as her gaze moves up to look at Wraith in the eye, serious as ever but a bit timid. The skirmisher thinks she looks quite nice like this.

She knows the answer and grins back.

"You know where to find me."

_..._

Viewers await for the smoke to clear while the cameras buzz around the arena.  


Bangalore stans watching the intense match are waiting for her signature cold-blooded finishers, but only to be disappointed to find out the soldier just shot the other legend mercifully down, even before they could properly see it.

The camera shifts to a more interesting perspective and Bangalore gets to sprinting.

She catches up to her teammates rather quickly, Wraith's team done for, and Bangalore's mostly intact.

Bloodhound looks up at her from where they are patching up a miserable looking Mirage.  
They don't say anything, but Bangalore knows them well enough to know that they are wordlessly asking where she was.

"Did I miss anything here?"  
Bloodhound shakes their head, "Negative, hostiles are taken care of."  
"Great, how's the fool holding up."

Mirage snaps his head up to protest, but realises that he's in no position to say anything back.

"He'll survive this time." Bloodhound finishes bandaging Mirage's leg, and stands up to face Bangalore.  


"But he certainly wasn't dead weight on the hunt."  
The goggles on Bloodhounds mask peer up at her (they're almost as tall as Bangalore but more intimidating when they want to be). She understands that they're asking to go easy on him.  
She nods back at Bloodhound, while looking at Mirage staggering upwards.

"Well if he's alright, let's get back to work, ladies. I got a date night tonight."  
She smiles with smug, Bloodhound nods at her approvingly, while Mirage looks confused, but not daring to question.

Bangalore takes a moment to check her inventory and allows her thoughts to linger on the subject of Wraith while Bloodhound helps Mirage gather his stuff.

A small smile is on her lips as Bloodhound silently walks to her side.  
"So you found a beloved during the hunt?" Their voice sounds hushed, but amused, if anyone else tried to tease her on the subject, they would probably end in a headlock, but it's Bloodhound. So Bangalore can't help but to sigh with a honest smile.  


"Guess I did..."

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading !  
> the title is from saint motel's save me, maybe a bit too dramatic for this work but ya gotta get a title from somewhere!  
> i don't write often and this was a wip for a while but am happy to post this now and if anyone enjoys it, that's great!


End file.
